


Correspondence

by arora_kayd, losty (orphan_account)



Category: Legend of Zelda: The Ocarina of Time
Genre: Angst, F/M, M/M, Possible Dub-Con, Post-OoT, Slash
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-10-30
Updated: 2012-10-30
Packaged: 2017-11-17 09:40:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 6,222
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/550198
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arora_kayd/pseuds/arora_kayd, https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/losty
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sheik writes a letter to Link years after the incident at the temple.</p><p>(January 2006)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Vindication

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted in the SheikxLink_Fc on LiveJournal, this fic (later first chapter) spawned what Point and I dubbed "The Angst War." Later I grouped the whole thing together under the terrible name "Correspondence" because I suck at titles. This work holds a special place in my heart as it was the first (and to date, only) multi chapter thing I'd ever worked on.
> 
> Also, I blame it all on "Radames' Letter" from the musical "Aida." Everytime I listen to that soundtrack I think of LoZ:OoT and Shink.

Dear Link, 

I love you.

I suppose you don’t believe me. Why should you? I doubt I would if I were you. But maybe you do? Perhaps you’re less jaded, cynical than I am. How could I possibly love you after everything I’ve done? After all I’ve said. You shouldn’t be able to lie to someone you truly love. It shouldn’t be so easy, right?

In some twisted way, it’s easier. It’s easier to convince yourself that the lies are better; that they will protect the loved one. Keep them from being hurt. And it’s true I suppose, as long as they don’t come to know the truth. As long as you can keep up the charade, as long as it doesn’t come crashing down in a sudden, terrific epiphany.

But it can’t last, can it? There are no safe havens that horror and hardship and reality can’t reach.

Love conquers all. Ha. Except life. Or fate. Loss of trust. Betrayal. Supposed destiny.

You were mine. I let her take you. Because of ‘destiny.’ Because it was the ‘right thing to do.’ Because everyone would be ‘better’ and ‘happier that way.’

Except me. Except you.

It’s not her fault. It’s mine. Honestly. Don’t blame her. She was as naïve as you were. It was me.

But I digress.

I had convinced myself that the lies were ok because it was best for you. That I had forgotten how part of you was still a young boy. I was wrong, of course. Now you know the truth. I was even more clueless that you thought you were.

I should never have let any of it happen. You should be with me now. In my arms. You should be happy. It’s the least you deserve. The very least. You were used. It was so unfair. You might have said yes to Deku, but you were, what, ten, eleven, twelve, when you started? You had no idea what you were getting into. What they were asking of you. But did they care? No. It was ‘destiny.’ (How I loathe that word. Nearly as much as I loathe myself.) You were never given a choice, were you? Not by Deku, not by Rauru, not by Zelda. Not by me. 

Goddesses. What did I do to you? Did I push you? If things had been different; if things hadn’t been so hurried and pressured and life threatening and hopeless and unending; If things had been normal, would you have let me be with you, hold you, love you? I pray to Farore that your answer would be yes.

But I’ll never know.

Again I deviate from the point.

I never told you. I always felt it was never the time, never the place. I was probably wrong about that too. So this letter will have to do. 

I love you. And I beg your undeserved forgiveness for… everything. For lying, for not telling you in person, for failing you. 

I love you.

≈Sheik

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just some clarification for some plot issues Point pointed out:  
> "Quick nit-pick, because I am finicky. If they slept together, why would Link still believe that Sheik was really Zelda? Not even Link’s that blonde. He knows girl-bits from boy-bits….At least I hope he does."  
> –On the whole 'boy-bits' issue, in my head Zelda explains it away as when she becomes Sheik it's a complete transformation (to seem authentic) and her sub-consious (or something like that...) takes over so she doesnt betray her identity through manerisms. Or something like that... >.> *heh heh*
> 
> "Let’s just pretend we and Sheik know how old Link is. …I am still disturbed that Sheik is, in effect, sleeping with a 10 year old."  
> –Ah yes, the age thing. Ok. I've always thought that Link was at least 10 when the game starts. I've heared that's he supposed to be 7... but I'm sticking with 10... So when he meets Sheik he's at least 17. Now I figure, just like with Lord of the Rings, that the whole 'Saving Hyrule' bit takes a while so Link ages to like 18 or 19. So it's all legal ^-^ At least for the canon of this fic.


	2. Condemnations and Obligations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Link replies to Sheik's letter.
> 
> (January 2006)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter written by Point_EaredPain  
> From the original post:  
> "arora_kayd dragged me into this. I wasn't given a choice. But here it is. I answered her challenge (post just below this one), and this was the result. Letter format. I also tried to get as close to her style as I could. I don't know how successful that was. "

Dear Sheik, 

I’ve always known that it was you. I’m not all as oblivious as everyone seems to think. I know just as much about obligations and expectations as you do. So when everyone expected a Hero of Time to use brawn instead of brain, to go heroically forth to save them all, to be, above all, complacent, I obliged them. Because that was easier. 

I knew as soon as I received your letter what you meant to say. I read it anyway. Not that knowing made it any easier. Because I know your scent from Zelda’s. I know the calluses on your hands, and even the curve of your eyelashes. I know, intimately, every plane and curve of your body. That one night was enough for me to learn the pitch and cadence of your breath. Enough for me to memorize the way you curled around me, even in your sleep, as though you could not bear to let me go. 

But you did. Because you thought it best. 

To tell you the truth, I was angrier at you than I have been in a long time. You wrote so easily of how others wronged me, but, in depriving me of a choice, you have abused me worse than any of them. I never had a choice in my destiny. You could have at least given me the choice in the path of my own heart. Surely I have earned that much? 

I doubt that I need to tell you how I would have chosen.

But the time for choices is past now. I have made mine. But please know that, no matter what you may think, and no matter how angry I ever was at you, I do not choose Zelda over you. I choose my son. For, you see, much has transpired in the land of Hyrule in the two years you took to write your letter. The Hero of Time wed the Princess, and not two months ago, she bore him his first-born son. Once again, I have done just what was expected of me. 

Do I regret it? Sometimes. Not when I hold my son in my arms and see the sunlight glinting off of his bright hair. But sometimes, when, at table, she places her soft, unscarred hand over mine. When, in the still of the night, I hear her soft breaths from the darkness and I can almost feel the phantom warmth of your body curled around me. 

But the time for all that is past. 

Not that I don’t still love you. At that’s the worst part of all. 

~Link

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From the original post:  
> "I apologize for the quality of this one. I wrote it literally while talking to arora_kayd, and angst is not my forte. But she wanted it. And she is the Queen of Angst. Far be it from me to refuse her. Because, after all, she is my friend. ♥♥♥"


	3. Penance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sheik's reply to Link's reply. I am fail at summaries. I'm sorry.
> 
> (February 2006)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I kind of regret the opening lines... Maybe someday I'll be a good enough writer to fix them properly.

_Sheik sat on the floor and wept, Link’s letter held gently in his hand, head downcast between his knees. Whatever tattered remains of his stubborn pride he still harbored fell down his face to fade into the dusty floor._

~~~~

Link, 

I

You

Congratulations. May your son grow to be every bit the man his father is.

…

I honestly have no right to respond to your letter. You, on the other hand, you have every right to hate me. Here I went on about others transgressions, feeling somehow superior by the fact that I had the fortitude to ask your forgiveness, only to come across as the hypocritical fool I am.

Two Years.

I had no idea so much time had passed.

No… that’s a lie. I knew, a part of me knew, and that part wished it had been longer. Goddess-damned Sheikah pride.

It kills me that you still care for me. That I, the one who claimed he understood, would protect you and keep away any more pain, have caused you so much anger.

You cannot fathom how happy it makes me to know you hate me. The twisted satisfaction from the knowledge that you still think of me (and some how care), and from the punishment and agony it brings.

What in Din’s name is wrong with me?

Again I go off on self-focused tangents. How could you ever have loved me?

That night… What can I say about that night? I would daresay that having the memory of that one night is worth your lasting scorn. But I would be lying again (it’s become habit). I’m sure you would be disgusted by the sheer amount of time I spend reliving that moment. And by the way I almost relish in the ache caused by the desire to repeat it and the knowledge that it can never happen. My actions have made sure of that.

I’m a broken man, Link. Alienated from the scatterings of my people by my emotions. Driven away from the one person who I ever loved by my self-destructive nature. Reduced to a plaything of destiny by my fears.

I tell you this not out of hope for pity, I do NOT deserve any. I tell you in hope that you will be able to move on. That this will in someway give you back the choice that I stole in a moment of concession. That you might be able to choose to continue hating me as I walk the lands, or to write me off as a phantom, a spirit sent to guide a journey and then disappear from memory.

You haunt me as well. I see you everywhere I go: a distant face in a crowd; in a cloak standing next to me; on every face in a tavern. I feel you every time someone touches me - brushes past. I hear you in laughter and music. And then you’re gone. A never-ending affirmation of my guilt.

And I thrive in it.

Even now I cannot bear to let you go. It eats at my soul. There is a near constant struggle, halting only in my dreams, against the instinct to run back to you. To whisk you away or even just catch a glimpse of you.

But I would never do that, for your son’s sake. Maybe I can do right by you, by never burdening him with the knowledge of my existence and the questions it would bring.

I shall disappear, become nothing more than another part of the Sheikah legend. Or perhaps become the lie, nothing more than Zelda’s mask.

May I ask but one favor? What is his name?

≈Sheik


	4. Interlude: The Morning After That Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From the original post:  
> "There has been a mutual agreement to a temporary cease-fire in the Angst Wars as point_earedpain and I figure out where the heck we're going with the Epic and give our depleted bunnies a chance to recouperate and reproduce. To help tide ya'll over until that time, and as a brief respite to all the angst that's been floating around lately, I bring you fluff. Short, sweet, nakie fluff! It's set after the infamous (Ha! I finally get to use my favorite word!) "that night" that has been cropping up in the Letter Epic as of late, as you may have guessed from it's terrible title. My brain is a little fried. And yet I stay up way to late anyhow. Aw well. Enjoy!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 100 word drabble.

Link awoke to gentle kisses being pressed against his neck. A noise of happiness and pleasure escaped his throat as he snuggled deeper into the naked warmth behind him. The tanned arm resting lazily upon his side slithered nest to his chest, hand drifting teasingly across his abdomen, as the kisses slowly trailed themselves along his jaw. He turned slightly as the roving kisses found their way to his lips, and he met them with equal and increasing fervor.

Pulling away, Sheik’s smiling crimson eyes gazed down at a slightly blushing Link as he offered a simple, “Good morning, Hero.”


	5. Careless Whispers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sheik and Link meet for the first time in two years.  
> Written by Point_Earedpain
> 
> (Please note, this chapter could be considered to contain dub-con. I personally don't think so, but who am I to judge what someone may find trigger-y?)
> 
> (March 2006)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From the original post:  
> "I totally meant to write this from Link’s POV, to keep with the Angst War characterisation, but Sheik just kinda muscled his way in. And pounded me into submission. Dammit. And, yes, the title is the name of a George Michael song. I know. I was listening to 80’s music as I wrote this, ok? It kinda infuses into your brain after a while."

Sheik could barely manage to convince his hands to stop shaking long enough for him to read Link’s latest, and shortest, letter. 

_Sheik,_  
Please, love, meet me at our cave in the Lost Woods at midnight in two nights time.  
Yours forever,  
Link 

As he turned to place it carefully in the drawer where he kept the other letter safe as well, he noticed a single line written on the back of the page. 

_P.S. His name is Asif._

*~*~*~*~*

Two nights later, Sheik was shaking again. His whole body trembled as he stared through the darkness into the pale blue of Link’s eyes. He had to swallow twice, hard, before his voice would obey him. 

“You gave him a Sheikah name.” His throat was still tight and dry. 

Link lowered his gaze to the sandy ground at the floor of the cave. “It… just felt right. And I felt, right then, that forgiveness was what was most needed." He sighed softly and looked back up, gazing once more into Sheik’s eyes. 

Sheik’s eyes began to sting as he murmured, “What we both needed.”

Link laughed harshly. “What I needed was you.”

Sheik tore his gaze away, the first tears starting to course down his cheeks. He shook his head, unable to speak; unable, suddenly, to even breathe. 

“Even now,” Link murmured, reaching out a hand, tracing his fingertips over the contours of Sheik’s cheekbone. He pulled down the faceguard, his icy eyes boring into Sheik’s with an intensity that was almost frightening. Link slipped his hands into the soft hair at the nape of Sheik’s neck. He leaned forward, kissing Sheik, pressing their mouths together so hard Sheik was sure their lips would bruise. Link’s fingers in Sheik’s hair tightened to the point of pain.

“Goddesses damn you,” Link whispered viciously before he kissed Sheik again, forcing his tongue into Sheik’s mouth. Heedless of the tears that now flowed sluggishly down Sheik’s cheeks, the Hero continued to kiss him harshly until the need for air forced them apart. 

Wrapping his free arm around Sheik’s waist, Link kissed him again, more gently this time, only placing a careful bite on Sheik’s lower lip. Link looked into up Sheik’s eyes, licking the residual salt of his lover’s tears from his lips. He reached up with his free hand gently, wiping away the last traces of tears. His fingers slackened in Sheik’s hair, now tenderly stroking the sensitive skin at the back of his neck.

Letting out a shuddering sigh, Link leaned his forehead down against the curve of Sheik’s shoulder. “These last two years have been hell. I just missed you so much, and being watched all the time, and I…” He trailed off, turning his head to kiss Sheik’s neck, nosing the soft fabric aside. “I’m sorry for taking it out on you,” he finished lamely. 

“I can’t say I blame you,” Sheik closed his eyes, calming slightly.

“Mmm. Doesn’t mean I’m not still angry, though.” 

Sheik’s breath cut short as he felt the wet heat of Link’s tongue against his throat, followed by the edge of teeth. He bit his lip to prevent a whimper. Link’s hot breath passed over his pulse, followed by a fierce suction. Sheik felt Link’s teeth scrape the pulse point and moaned, knowing there would be a mark in the morning. A dark thrill slid down his spine at the thought.

Link’s body pressed hard against his, pushing him back. Slowly, they moved toward the cave wall as Link hastily stripped Sheik’s clothes from him. He finally pulled his hand out of Sheik’s hair to trace both hands over the bared skin, the sharp edges of his nails biting into him. Even as Link’s hands wandered down to rub the small of Sheik’s back and then slowly slide lower, his mouth glided down over Sheik’s collarbone, nipping gently. Kissing down the center of his chest, he occasionally paused to bite or suck, leaving strawberry marks behind. Abruptly, he licked Sheik’s nipple, and Sheik jerked. His muscles tensed as Link sucked gently, then he was helpless to prevent his desperate shout as he felt the sharp edges of Link’s teeth bite the very tip of his nipple. Link’s laughing breath puffed over the slight sting left by the bite. Sheik shuddered as Link’s mouth meandered to the other side of his chest. After laving the tight peak to shining wetness, Link blew a gentle stream of cold air over it and Sheik whimpered. At the tight, needy sound, Link’s hands slid over Sheik’s ass and squeezed hard. 

“Wrap your leg around me,” Link whispered harshly, sliding his mouth up to nip the lobe of Sheik’s ear. As Sheik complied, Link rocked his hips hard against him, forcing their erections together. Sheik hadn’t even realised that he’d grown hard, too focused on the pleasure of Link’s hands and mouth. Thrown off-balance with his leg wrapped around Link’s slender hips, he trembled at the feeling of submission, new and overwhelming.

One of Link’s hands reached up to Sheik’s face, his thumb rubbing over Sheik’s bottom lip. As Sheik’s tongue flickered out to lap at it gently, Link’s eyes darkened to a stormy sapphire. He pressed the tips of his first two fingers against Sheik’s mouth, pushing gently. Sheik opened his mouth, pulling them inside, his tongue curling sensuously around the digits as he sucked. Link hissed softly. After a few moments, though, he pulled his hand away from Sheik’s mouth and slid his moistened finger down Sheik’s spine, then down between Sheik’s buttocks, circling the unused opening. Without warning, he forced his whole finger inside. Sheik cried out and tried to squirm away from the unfamiliar feeling. Trapped with his upper back against the wall and Link’s other hand holding his hip in a grip so tight it almost hurt, all he could was sob softly. 

Nevertheless, he turned his head, burying his face in Link’s golden hair as Link slid another finger into him. Sheik whimpered as the fingers twisted inside him, scissoring and stretching him open mercilessly. He sighed with relief when Link finally pulled them away.

Pressing Sheik into the cave’s rough wall so that he wouldn’t fall over, Link pulled Sheik’s hands away from his shoulders. Holding them tightly in his own, he looked up at Sheik. 

“Spit into your hands,” Link growled. Sheik would have laughed, or perhaps been slightly disgusted, but for the sparking intensity in Link’s eyes. He did as he’d been told, then allowed his hands to be pulled to Link’s hardness. “Do it,” Link whispered harshly, leaning their foreheads together. Sheik could feel the warmth of Link’s quick breaths as he smoothed the wetness over Link’s erection, savouring the feel of its heat and the contrast between hard flesh and silky skin. Just as he felt Link start to shudder, Link pulled away, pressing a brief, sloppy kiss against his mouth.

Link grabbed Sheik’s hips with both hands, tilting them. Sheik caught his breath, clinging tightly to Link’s biceps as he felt himself being pulled even more off-balance. He felt the moist head of Link’s erection pressing against his entrance and tightened his grip on Link’s arms.

One quick thrust, and the head of Link’s erection was inside him. Sheik squeezed his eyes shut tightly, trying to block out the pain. One more thrust, and Link was sheathed in him completely. Mercifully, he paused for a moment and they both caught their breath. 

All too soon, though, Link began to move within him. Slowly at first, but then gradually increasing both the speed and strength of his thrusts. Sheik sobbed softly. It hurt. He hid his face in Link’s hair and wrapped his arms around his shoulders, holding on tightly. Link grunted softly and pressed his torso more tightly against the wall, so hard that Sheik felt the rough edges of the stone dig into his back painfully. They ground against him as Link hitched him up higher. Sheik, irrationally, marvelled at the Hero’s strength as he briefly pulled arm away to pull Sheik’s other leg around himself. 

Suddenly, it was as though something within Sheik had clicked into place. He cried out as pleasure flooded though his body in waves. Words, endearments, pleas all crashed together in his head, coming out as incoherent cries. He could barely catch his breath. 

Inevitably and all too soon, his body tightened, convulsing. Helpless, he cried out Link’s name, and heard his own panted against his neck. A rush of warmth flooded into his body, and he felt the exact moment when Link’s legs gave out. They slid down to the floor, Link’s cock softening inside him, the wall rasping painfully against his back. 

Curled together against the cave wall, he pressed his exhausted body closer to Link’s, laying his head on Link’s shoulder after pressing a gentle kiss to it. They were both silent as they struggled to regain their breath. Finally, Sheik sighed. He knew he would be sore soon, as soon as the afterglow wore off, but for the moment he was content. Or… almost content. 

“When can we be together again?” Sheik asked quietly. He felt Link’s breath stutter against his hair. 

“You’re asking me to be consistently unfaithful to the Queen of Hyrule?” Link’s tone was, without warning, incredulous. 

“I just want to see you. We don’t have to do …this,” Sheik gestured widely at their naked, entwined bodies.

Link extricated himself from their tangle and sat up, pulling up his legs to his chest and wrapping his arms around them. He leaned his cheek against his knee. “No,” he whispered. Sheik’s chest constricted. Heedless, Link continued, “I can’t just… have an affair. You know I can’t. How will I ever be able to look Zelda in the eye again? Dammit, how will I ever be able to face Asif?”

Feeling somehow dirty and used, Sheik reached for his clothes. “So, this is it?”

“This was a mistake, Sheik. I never meant for it to happen. It just…” Link trailed off, shaking his head. “I’m sorry.” 

Throat so tight it was painful, Sheik stared at the floor. I suppose I deserve this, for what I did, he thought to himself. Unable to speak, he brushed the sand from his body and rapidly pulled on his clothes. As he rose to leave, Link caught hold of his forearm. 

“I truly am sorry, Sheik. You know I still love you. You must.” Link’s eyes stared pleadingly into his. Sheik nodded, still too shocked to force the words past the pain in his chest. 

As he turned to leave the cave, he finally found his voice. “Don’t seek me out again. Don’t write to me.” Rather, it was almost his voice. Choked with tears and hoarse from sex, he almost didn’t recognise it as his own. He turned back to look at Link for one last time, only for a moment. “I will not be your whore.”


	6. Elusive Slumber

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sheik!Angst for everyone! Sheik's reaction to what Link did. Bad Link. No cookie for you!
> 
> (April 2006)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter written by both Point_EaredPain and myself.

Sheik curled himself into a fetal position. He turned his face away from the dim light of the single candle illuminating the tiny chamber. He had remained there for the rest of the night, ignoring everything around him. His whole body hurt, not just the more obvious places. When he'd turned up on Impa's doorstep, she'd taken one look at him and, without any need for explanations, had ushered him gently into a small, private corner of her home. All he could focus on was trying to figure out what had gone wrong.

At least now he knew what betrayal felt like. How the anger and confusion and pain consumed you. Even though he felt so terribly violated, he still wanted Link. He wanted to hold him, to ask why, to fix it all; but he couldn't imagine seeing him again. 

Love. In his letter Link had called him love. The endearment had struck a deep cord in Sheik, one he had tried to sever for many months. And then he had dared to say the word again after taking away Sheik’s hope of them ever reconciling. After blaming his own actions on Sheik and speaking in that condescending tone of voice. The mere recollection sent a white-hot fury through Sheik’s body. 

That only served to temporarily block the ever-lingering pain of longing. Links admission of love, however questionable the circumstances and sincerity, only made it worse. He reflected that it was his own naivety that brought some of this pain. How could he have thought, after all he’d been through and seen, that if Link said those words again that everything would have changed? That a simple three-word phrase would erase the past years and bring about the happily-ever-after they deserved?

Sheik tried to lose himself in the memory of their first night together. However, the gentleness and love that had permeated every touch and action that night was now tainted. Instead of the dull heat of the fire and soft blanket, all Sheik could feel was the coarse rock at his back. Gentle kisses became bruising and intense. Sheik quickly closed off the memory, fearing that it would become forever erased if he continued.

Confusion set in then. He didn’t understand why Link had pushed him away, why he didn’t want to be together. Link had asked him to meet him. Had kissed him. Had… gone further. Then why did he reject Sheik?

Sheik would have been content to just spend time with Link, to be near him once more, no matter how much it hurt not to be with him. Then Link had gone and cheapened that desire, calling it an affair, degrading Sheik’s feelings into nothing more than carnal need. Had ignored Sheik’s dismissal of the notion, thereby spurning all of Sheik’s opinions.

That’s what hurt the most. The bruises would heal in a few weeks; but the emotional scars would pain Sheik for years, if not the rest of his life. It was too much, too much to add to the pain he already felt from his past.

Sheik just wanted it to end.


	7. Letters of Pain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Link suffers the fallout from his actions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another jointly written chapter.

Sheik,

Do not just discard this. Please. 

Forgive me. I have wronged you, and I am sorry. There really is no excuse for my grievous actions. I was so angry, angry at you still for what happened before, angry at fate for our duties, angry about all the lies, and angry at myself for still wanting you and even thinking of running away with you.

I can’t believe that it was really me that did that. It felt as though someone else was wearing my skin, and I was watching from somewhere else. But that is no excuse, either. It was me, and I can still feel your tears, floating in the darkness every time I close my eyes.

Isn’t it ironic, the way the tables have turned? Me betraying you. It was a betrayal after all; you gave me your trust and I abused it. Maybe this is the Three’s way of teaching me. Or maybe it’s their punishment.

~Link

~*~*~*~*~

Sheik,

It’s been several months since my last letter to you, and I have not yet received a reply. Perhaps you tore it up without ever even opening it, or maybe you were still too angry or felt me insincere.

I meant every word I wrote. And I would have you know that my heart aches for you constantly. 

I would ask again for your forgiveness, despite being near certain that you won’t give it. So, instead of that, I ask only for word that you are coping, that you have managed to move on.

~Link

~*~*~*~*~

Sheik, please. It’s been nearly eight months. Why have I heard nothing of you? Not even a reprimand for writing you after you told me not to. I’m… worried. I do love you, no matter how hard I fight against it.

Tell me that you are alright. Or even that you hate me. I would at least know that you are alive. Even if you hate the thought of me, or even if you have banished me from your heart and mind altogether, I want to know that. Just so long as you are healing. 

~Link

~*~*~*~*~

Link, 

I regret to inform you that my nephew is dead. I knew that the two of you were ...involved, and I thought you deserved to know the truth.

Some 9 months ago, he’d disappeared one night, to see you, he’d said. When he returned, he was a changed man. He’d always been quiet, but now he seemed to have withdrawn into himself. For days, it was a struggle to get him to eat. When, eventually, he had dragged himself out of whatever stupor he had fallen into, he simply left the house and I heard nothing from him for weeks. Then, one morning, he was back, silent as a ghost and covered in blood. Fortunately, as I found out, most of the blood was not his own. He did not tell me where he had been, telling me that he was simply out ‘hunting.’ And this cycle kept repeating, with slight variations. Only, each time he went out, he seemed to have eaten and slept less and less, and each time, more of the blood was his own. I do not know what had transpired that night that he was gone, but it seemed to have broken him. What did you do to him, Link? 

And one day, he simply did not come back. Only a few days ago, a few men of the village brought back his body. It was difficult to recognize him, from the blood and wounds, but I raised him, and I would know him anywhere, no matter what state he was in. And his face, what I could see of it, was calmer than I had seen since that night. It was as though he was glad that his life had fled. I could never understand my little sandstorm, but you seemed to, and I thought you might help me find out what had gone so wrong. 

~Impa


	8. Disillusioned

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After learning of Sheik's death, Link struggles to comes to terms.
> 
> (July 2006)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jointly written.

Link was utterly dumbstruck.

He was dead? Sheik died? Sheik couldn’t die. Sheik just did not die.

A hole seemed to worm it’s way into Link’s chest, eating his soul away at a painfully slow pace.

Breathing became difficult as he re-read the words and threw the letter on his desk, gripping his head with both hands. Impa’s accusation haunted him. What did you do to him, Link? He felt the rising of tears, but they would not come. He craved their cathartic release, but his eyes remained dry.

Link was unsure of how much time passed, only dimly aware that it had grown darker when the door to his study opened. He raised his head, arms crossed in front of him on the desk, waiting for the intruder to speak. Link looked down when he felt a tugging on his long shirt and produced a weak smile for his son.

“What’s wrong, Daddy?” Asif immediately noticed Link’s saddened disposition and hugged his father’s leg. Link reached down and pulled the boy onto his lap. Back to chest, he hugged Asif to him, finding comfort in his warmth, and rested his chin of Asif’s head.

“A close friend of Daddy’s passed away.” Asif deserved to know that much, and so did Sheik.

“I’m sorry.” Asif hugged Link’s arms and settled himself. A moment passed before Link placed a kiss on the blond head under him.

“Me too.” Asif stayed on his fathers lap, eyes slowly falling as Link gently rocked him. It wasn’t long before Asif was yawing and fighting to keep his eyes open. Link repositioned his son, linking the boy’s arms around his neck, and carried him to bed.

After tucking Asif in, Link returned to his own room. Zelda sat at her vanity and Link pressed a kiss to her cheek as he passed. Sitting down heavily on their bed, Link began undressing for bed. Hearing a sigh to her right, Zelda turned to look at her husband, noting the same off mood as her son had.

“What’s the matter?”

“Nothing. It’s just…been a long day.” Link dismissed, knowing anything more specific would raise too many questions. Zelda knew that part of Link missed the old days of heroism and chalked his mood to that longing.

Zelda moved to the bed and settled herself under the covers where Link joined her a few minuets later. She initiated a good night kiss that Link kept short before he rolled to his side, facing the right wall. Zelda stared at his naked back for a moment before lying down in a mirror position.

A few days later found Link at his desk, quill resting idly in his hand as he stared at the blank parchment in front of him. It took some time for the words to come to him, and even then they were disjointed. 

…………………

Impa,

It should have been me. It was all my fault. It should have been me.

I won’t speak of what happened, for both his and my sakes. Just know that he didn’t deserve what I did. It was far worse than anything he could have ever done.

I was just so angry… everything…

I just don’t…

I never meant…

~~Sheik was always so strong. He should have been able to cope~~

There I go blaming others again. Goddesses! Why can’t I learn? If I hadn’t blamed him then things would be so different… wouldn’t they? I just don’t know any more.

Forgive me. I can no longer fix things with him. I hope my deepest, sincerest apologies bring you some comfort.

At least he was… happy in the end. He deserves happiness, and to rest. He earned it… he earned a lot more than I gave him credit for it seems. Selfish – that is what I was.

I’m so sorry, Sheik. 

I…

~ Link

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From the original post:  
> We're pretty sure there's going to be one more chapter *maybe* two.... but it's still kinda up in the air.


	9. Interlude: Idle Hours

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More fluff to break up the angst
> 
> (August 2006)

Link made his way cautiously out of the Temple of Time. Getting past the Re-deads in the area had become habit; the wrongness of that thought was not lost on him. He was happy to get back in the field and ride Epona once more.

Link had just spent two weeks in the past. The experience had been… surreal; in his mind he was still a grown up and being around people who had no idea what hell the next seven years would bring had severely dampened his joy at seeing Hyrule as it had once been.

After riding hard for a while, Link just let Epona wander where she might. He was well aware (though with Navi’s constant reminders you would have thought otherwise) that he needed to finish dealing with the Shadow Temple in Kakariko, but he needed to gather his thoughts after his stint in the past more. 

Lost in his thoughts, Link had no idea where they were when he heard the distinctive sound of a lyre. Looking around, Link discovered the source of the sound sitting under a nearby tree. Link hopped off Epona and headed toward Sheik, knowing that if Sheik had wanted to be alone, Link would never have seen him.

“Hello… Hero,” Sheik greeted as Link sat down beside him, mock glaring at the use of the title.

“Sheikah,” Link countered with a wicked smile. Link saw Sheik still bore a few wounds from the ordeal at the well, which he hadn’t noticed in the rain and smoke. There was an abrasion from sliding in the dirt on his cheek and, guessing by the additional wrappings, one on his left hand and forearm and right knee as well. “You’re looking a little worse for the wear.”

“Nothing a little time won’t fix. Not everyone feels the need to run off to a Fairy Fountain or a potion shop when they get the slightest injury.”

“Ok, I did that, like, once at the Forest Temple! I was a little nervous. And the splinter had gone in deep.” Sheik’s smirk was evident through his mask. “The fountain was right there and it really stung. Shut up.”

“Whatever you say.” They sat in silence for a moment, giving Link time to sulk. “How was your trip back?”

“Disconcerting,” Link admitted after thinking it over.

“I see. What are you going to do now?”

“Take a day off.” As if to emphasize his point, Link stretched out on his side, propping himself up on an elbow. “You?”

“As it so happens, the same.”

“What do you say we take it off together?”

“Sounds tempting… What would we do?” Sheik asked, turning towards Link.

“We could fish, attempt to map the lost woods, harass cuccos,” Link ticked the option off on his fingers,“ or we could just stay here by ourselves…”

“I’m not much in the mood for moving. In fact, I just might have a lie down. And there just so happens to be a pillow right here.” Sheik leaned over and pushed Link onto his back, stretched his arms and, pulling down his mask, made himself comfortable on Links stomach. Link laughed and ruffled Sheiks hair, pulling off his head wraps in the process, causing Sheik to let out an indignant noise.

They lay there for sometime, watching the sun and clouds drift across the sky.

“We don’t have many of these days left,” Sheik said suddenly as the sun began to sink. Link propped himself up, forcing Sheik to do the same.

“We’ll see when this is all over. I haven’t had all my optimism beaten out of me-yet. And whatever the case may be, we can still make the days we do have count.” Sheik couldn’t bring himself to share Link’s sentiments and just smiled slowly. He leaned in, closing the space between them and moved his arm to Link’s other side, half covering him.

“Then there’s no time to waste. This day is almost over.” Sheik tilted his head down, bringing their lips together. Link hummed his approval as a hand found it’s was back into Sheik’s hair


	10. One Authors Notes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wherein I struggle with whether or not to mark this fic as completed.

As you may have noticed, this fic is over six years old, and that while we had predicted a few more chapters nothing happened. This whole thing just kind of happened. There was never any over arching plot worked out or an end goal in mind so eventually we reached an impasse and didn't know where to go from there. 

As I said at the beginning this fic is special to me and in those six years I haven't forgotten it and have wanted desperately to finish it. However, several things have happened: I have apparently lost my ability to write fic -I no longer get ideas or at least none that pan out to more than a vague idea or one or two sentences; I'm not sure my co-writter in even interested in picking this back up; and more than that, RL had just made the logistics of working on this difficult.

I stubbornly and perhaps irrationally still hold out hope that one day the plot bunnies with once again grace me with their presence and I will be able to at least add a satisfactory ending to this fic in not continue it for several more chapters.

I feel incredibly guilty for leaving the people who read this fic hanging for so very, very long. Maybe posting it here will light a fire under my brain and make it finally cooperate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And I really don't know why the end note from the first chapter keeps popping up at the end of other chapters. Maybe Ao3 is mad at me?

**Author's Note:**

> Just some clarification for some plot issues Point pointed out:  
> "Quick nit-pick, because I am finicky. If they slept together, why would Link still believe that Sheik was really Zelda? Not even Link’s that blonde. He knows girl-bits from boy-bits….At least I hope he does."  
> –On the whole 'boy-bits' issue, in my head Zelda explains it away as when she becomes Sheik it's a complete transformation (to seem authentic) and her sub-consious (or something like that...) takes over so she doesnt betray her identity through manerisms. Or something like that... >.> *heh heh*
> 
> "Let’s just pretend we and Sheik know how old Link is. …I am still disturbed that Sheik is, in effect, sleeping with a 10 year old."  
> –Ah yes, the age thing. Ok. I've always thought that Link was at least 10 when the game starts. I've heared that's he supposed to be 7... but I'm sticking with 10... So when he meets Sheik he's at least 17. Now I figure, just like with Lord of the Rings, that the whole 'Saving Hyrule' bit takes a while so Link ages to like 18 or 19. So it's all legal ^-^ At least for the canon of this fic.


End file.
